


Easy As One, Two Three (An Alphabet Series Remix)

by NEStar



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Star Trek: Enterprise, Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: The Original Series, Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-16
Updated: 2010-05-16
Packaged: 2017-10-09 12:14:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/87212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NEStar/pseuds/NEStar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of drabbles from the whole Star Trek universe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Easy As One, Two Three (An Alphabet Series Remix)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CaitN](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaitN/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Alphabet Series](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/792) by CaitN. 



> Thanks to Second Silk for the beta service.

**A is for Andorian**

It was an odd feeling to have the five years of work edited, slimed down and presented to you on a PADD.

 

It was the end result of the process, of course. But seeing it there, so clean and clinical... The last time he had read those words there had been notes scrawled in the margins and files attached linking to research.

 

“Neurobiology for an Expanding Universe.” by Dr. Leonard McCoy.

 

He hated the title but as he hadn't been able to come up with a better one, so the editors had won that point.

 

Index of Chapters

 

Introduction

Biological Families

The Importance of Superficial Anatomy

 

Oh god, it was so dry that even he was falling asleep.

 

Len murmured a silent apology to whatever poor bastards would be forced to study the thing before he dropped the book in to the bottom drawer of his desk and walked off in search of dinner.

 

 

 

**B is for Bajoran**

Rom sighed, “My son is insane.”

  
“Rom.” Ezri chided.

  
“He's a one-legged crazy man!”

  
“He is not crazy.”  


Ben Sisko interrupted, “But he is living in a holosuite.”

  
“At first, it struck me as a little peculiar.” Ezri agreed, “But after I thought it over, I began to think that this might be a good sign after all.”

  
“How can hiding in one of Julian's adolescent programs be a good sign?” Quark asked.

  
“It could be worse.” Jake said, “After all, he does have that copy of  Betty Does Bajor.”

 

 

 

**D is for Deltan**

Morris knew it was wrong. Everyone at the academy knew that any Deltan who traveled off-world must take a vow of celibacy, but the thought that  _ he _ had made the beautiful Ilia forget that vow...

 

He spent ten months in the hospital afterwards and his dream of a career in Starfleet was over, but it had been so worth it.

 

 

 

**F is for Ferengi**

It had started as a trading trick. No matter what species, men lost higher mental function in the presence of a naked woman. This lead to higher profits for the Ferengi women.

 

But somewhere along the line, women grew weak. They allowed themselves to be used and pushed aside.

 

Ishka took a deep breath and slipped into the pants. She would show those men just who had the lobes for profit.

 

 

 

**G is for Gorn**

As Slar felt his body grow heavier and heavier he knew that the human Archer had tricked him.

 

“One day, your people will beg for the help of the Gorn.” he spat.

 

Archer aimed his phase rifle and fired. “I'd hate to see the enemy that would be facing us in that day,” he said as he fired again.

 

 

 

**I is for Iconian &amp; ** **Q is for Q**

It was an accident, really. Q had bestowed sexual irresistibility on dozens of lesser lifeforms without anything more tragic happening then pulled muscles and unplanned pregnancy. Well, there was that one time on one of his first visits to Earth when he had phrased it as “Love Potion #9” that the young male had kissed a law enforcement officer and had been jailed.

 

Still, the idea that he was some how responsible for the destruction of the Iconian race was just absurd.

 

“But it still stands. If not for you, the Iconian race would still be with us.”

 

“Oh, very well.” Q sighed, “The pool table it is.”

 

 

 

**K is for Klingon**

The dishonor that had befallen the Klingon people through K'Vagh actions at the time of the Levodian Flu was a shame that they all had to bear.

 

For nearly one-hundred years the dishonor was written plainly on their bodies before the ridges began to return.

 

Klingon women across the whole empire rejoiced.

 

 

 

**L is for Lurian**

Morn listened patently as Aluura talked; it's what he did. Some men were handsome and some men were charming, but Morn knew he was neither of these.

 

“You are such an amazing listener.” Aluura said, “I feel like I could talk to you about anything”

 

Morn smiled and gestured towards the door.

 

Once they reached his ship, Aluura didn't speak for the rest of the night.

 

 

 

**M is for Mugato &amp; N is for Nausicaan**

Even after the close call with Phlox, Hoshi and Liz keep up their “studying”.

 

“Mugato,” Liz read out, “average penis length is 7 inches.”

 

“Not that bad.” Hoshi replied.

 

Liz continued, “There is a group of muscles in the pelvis that allow for independent thrusting motion.”

 

“Oh my god, like some kind of natural jack hammer.” Hoshi snickered.

 

"Gives new meaning to the phrase power tool.”

 

 

 

**O is for Ocampa**

The first time Kas stepped into the sunlight, she was unprepared for how warm it was.

 

Quickly she removed her clothes and let the rays warm her whole body.

 

It was worth it – everything she had faced in leaving the city – for this one moment in the sun.

 

 

 

**S is for Suliban**

Following the destruction of the Cabal the few hundred Suliban left made sure too keep a low profile. Three generations passed before they risked going back to the Tandar sector and a further two before they ventured in to Federation space.

 

It wasn't until the Dominion War that a Suliban again set foot on a Federation ship. But this time they were working with Star Fleet, not against them.

 

 

 

**U is for Ullian**

Jev had been in this horrible place for seven years. Seven years of shame, seven years of soul crushing humiliation, seven years of his life that he could never get back.

 

“Do you need time to thank on my offer?” the armored man asked him.

 

Jev looked at the glowing green light coming from the visor, “I've had seven years to think of how I'd end the Federation. What do you want me to do?”

 

 

 

**W is for Wadi**

“I just wished to reiterate how sorry I am for your inconvenience during the game.”

 

Jadzia smiled at the young man, “Since your people like games so much, why don't I introduce you to strip poker?”


End file.
